Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit. Billy Connolly

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. Robert Anderson

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. Honore de Balzac

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. Josh Billings

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without. James C. Dobson

Thirty five years ago a very young twenty one year old girl walked down the aisle of the synagogue to stand under the chupah next to her Prince Charming, her knight in shining armour, and her best friend. It was pretty crowded under that wedding canopy and the expectations of both bride and groom were probably a bit unrealistic to begin with.

I brought a LOT of baggage with me thanks to my mother and it took nearly twenty five years to finally resolve the problem by ending the relationship with her. But I thought my big, strong, clever husband was going to solve that delicate situation...somehow. The awfulness of her effect on me reached such epic proportions that we were seriously considering moving to Australia at one point just to put enough distance between us until Allan quite rightly decided that his parents didn't deserve to be punished by being deprived of their only child's presence as well as any children that would come along. After all, he had made them wait a long time for a daughter-in-law by not marrying until he was forty two and to say they were impatient a for grandchild would be putting it mildly. He just couldn't do it to them.

I discovered that Allan wasn't quite the all knowing, all seeing perfect man I thought he was. (I said I was young) And of course as I've blogged about many, many times I discovered over the years that sexually we were and are probably completely ill suited to each other.

But ignoring that little detail for the time being...over the past thirty five years we have managed to raise two children who are rather lovely human beings-are gainfully employed, have boyfriends/girlfriends, and best of all(g)enjoy our company. We have also supported each other through the deaths of Allan's parents which was thankfully quick and my father's which wasn't. My younger brother's diagnosis of cancer and his decision to move in with us which was very hard as was his death in six short ghastly weeks. And my mother's passing a few years later. And of course Allan's illnesses these past few years have tested us again and again we have seen some very dark days but I think we've done pretty damn well all things considered.

All in all, do I have a perfect marriage? No, after all these years I wish I could say I have it all figured out and have worked out all the issues. But I can't because life has a way of surprising you and just not being neat and tidy. But I married a very good man and I know he loves me in his own imperfect way just as I do love him even though he can't give me everything I need. Does anyone get everything?

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Mignon McLaughlin

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open. George Bernard Shaw

• A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. Paul Sweeney
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Now don't fall down laughing but this was 'our' song at our wedding. I've been searching forever for a version of the original with Steve Lawrence & Eydie Gorme but this was all I could come up with. The Osmonds- *sigh* Beggars can't be choosers.
  It was never exactly a hawt song, but Allan's ring is inscribed, 'we made it' and mine says, 'together'....you can all gag now. LOL